SATIRIST | NOVELIST | RECOVERING LAWYER
For bookings, festivals, commissions, interviews please email email@example.com
For other acts of personal kindness, email firstname.lastname@example.org
For unpaid work in the guise of "exposure", "social good", saving humanity etc, kindly find someone else to impoverish. Confused? Ok, let me simplify this a bit with this brief guide:
1. If I cannot take some of it to a store in exchange for goods and services it is NOT payment.
2. Flights, transport, accommodation, these things are not payment. They are not favors either. These are basic and non negotiable if I am moving from one city or country to another. I do not have spiritual powers or large powerful wings yet. While I work on these awesome super powers, I must get to your venue somehow. This is your job. Not mine.
3. If you open with or have in your email "we do not usually pay speakers" then you might want to delete my email from the recipient line. I am sure you will find people who find "exposure" sexy. I am not one of them.
4. There is nothing sexy about a starving artist. We want the same basic things you want. We shop at the same shops you shop. If you receive a salary, don't deny me one.
5. Writing is not a hobby for me. It is a career. I have other hobbies. So, I can come with you to a movie or game or party (that serves free drinks) or concert for free. But, yeah, that's about it.